Questions for Passover Seder

 Questions for Passover Seder

What is our Jewish Identity?

The Passover Seder, from chocolate to traditional, perfectly encapsulates my Judaism. Where we gather to indulge in ritualistic food, tell mostly-remembered stories, welcome all guests, and ask important questions, Passover is my favorite holiday. Asking questions is, for me, at the heart of our Jewish identity. It is lovingly pushed on the youngest at the Passover Seder and begets jokes about rooms full of Jews having more opinions than there are people. I’m concerned, though, that now more than ever, our ability to question is being squashed.

You don’t have to be Jewish to know the Golden Rule well. Rabbi Hillel’s version is “What is hateful to you, do not do to your neighbor. That is the whole Torah; the rest is commentary.” A simple lesson in treating our fellow humans with love. Hillel teaches this as the core value of our religion.

Yet we, as American Jews, are being told that not all humans are our neighbors. That some people aren’t equal, aren’t created B’tselem Elohim (In God’s Image), and therefore don’t deserve the kindness the golden rule teaches. As if kindness were a finite resource and it would be wasted on others.

We as Jews are commanded to choose life, Deut. 30:19. Why then, does Israel continue to systematically bomb hospitals, mosques, and schools? Why does Israel truculently stand against Pikuach Nefesh (saving a soul) when those souls are not Jewish?

Jonathan Glazer recently spoke at the Oscars about his Jewishness being used to rationalize an occupation which has led to conflict. Glazer bravely spoke about this concern that many American Jews have felt is not welcomed in our communities.

Why is my Judaism being used to justify a genocide? The Jewish values of loving your neighbor, saving life, and asking questions are in conflict with the organizations that claim to teach them. Organizations that happily take our money for planting trees and use it to illegally displace Palestinians. Organizations that promote the propagandic and incorrect maps and further dehumanize the Palestinian people who have been forcibly displaced, as many Jews were in the years leading up to the Holocaust.

American Jews are being told to support Israel. But how can we stand with a nation that drops bombs on righteous, wicked, and innocent alike? A nation whose onslaught is protected by an iron dome, funded by our taxes, and controlled by the type of strong-man dictator who we, as Jews, have spent our history fleeing?

I am proud of my Judaism, of my Jewish community, and of the Jewish families that raised me. I exist only as a direct result of my grandparents surviving the Holocaust, a genocide of which I heard horrible stories at each family dinner. To know Israel is creating similar horrors to a neighboring people confounds me. 

As it happens, I share a name with the biblical Abraham, a character who argued with God to save people in Sodom and Gomorrah from destruction. The same name of Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel who marched with Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. for civil rights in 1965. Heschel said he was “praying with his feet” in joining the protest, using the values of Judaism in action. I have no audience with God but I know the Jewish values I was taught: to cherish life, repair the world, and care for the stranger; for we were strangers in a strange land and importantly, to ask questions. Is Israel keeping to these Jewish values?

A genocide is occurring at Israel’s hands and I hear repeated calls for prayer, but I will not pray. I will not send futile prayers for the families of those killed, the communities who have lost entire family trees, or cities that have lost all semblance of their culture. I know all too well the deafening silence from the nonexistent or uncaring God. My own family tree is over pruned due to the lack of actions of those who did not stand up against a man with power who wanted more and the millions who condoned or defended his status quo. I will not pray idly, but this is my first step in praying with my feet. We must bravely stand against genocide. We must stand against genocide especially when the nation committing it says it is doing so in our name. 

I condemn the deadly actions of Hamas, of course. But I also condemn the genocidal actions of Israel that have been occurring since before October 7, 2023 and have dramatically increased since. This must stop, and as we know from the Passover story, Pharaohs are nothing without the people they control. Thus I leave you with four questions to bring to your Seder to discuss the Jewish values in our current world:

1. Is associating Judaism to the actions of Israel bringing about more anti-Jewish hate?

2. Why is the same word (aid) used to describe weapons sent to Israel and food sent to Palestinians?

3. Are we desensitized to the horrible treatment of humans - have our hearts hardened as Pharaoh’s did?

4. Will there be family dinners in the future for current Palestinian children to share their horrors? How much more of the family trees in Gaza will be pruned before we object?

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I want to address my use of the term ‘genocide’ in this. This opinion piece was rejected from a local Jewish publication because, "we aren’t going to publish a piece with falsehoods and using words like genocide to describe what’s happening." This is further evidence that our ability to question is being squashed. But I will continue to question: If not genocide, what word would you use to describe it when:

• People are literally dying of hunger because Israel restricts food.

• Over 75% of Palestinians in the Gaza Strip, or 1,700,000 individuals have been forcibly displaced and are classified as Internally Displaced Persons (IDPs).

• Human Rights Experts say Israel's actions are acts of genocide.

• Even Elizabeth Warren says there is ample evidence to classify this as a legal genocide.

• More than half the homes in Gaza have been damaged.

• Of the original 36, there are zero hospitals functioning at full capacity, 13 are partially functioning. All damaged due to Israeli attacks.

And if your response to this information is "That's antisemitic!" You missed what I wrote above and Israel has successfully convinced you to associate Judaism (and thus a Jewish identity) with the terrible actions of a country.

An open letter to my students, former students, and former staff.

Ugh, if I see one more article or commercial start with a variant of “in these trying times….”
*clears throat*
In this time of high anxiety and low certainty, of frequent video calls and infrequent deodorant use, of frustrating politics and soothing walks, of conservative spending and liberal ice cream consumption, of staring down my partner’s cat and staring off into space; I’ve been missing my biggest connection to Judaism.

I’ve missed spending time with you. Working and volunteering at Jewish summer camps, youth groups, and supplemental schools over the years has given me the opportunity to explore my Judaism with others. I’ve been able to learn what I teach through different lenses and to learn through conversations from unlikely educators. Even if the lesson plan or the camp evening program is not centrally Jewish, it is part of my Jewish Identity, and I know it is some of yours as well.

For the past 6 or so weeks that I’ve been working from home, hanging out with friends from home, having family arguments from home, cooking all meals at home, and running outside with a mask, I’ve missed more than just being outside of this building. A hole has formed where there once was a place I could gather with enthusiastic students. I feel like I’m mourning.

And I realize the privilege I have in saying I’m mourning a part of my life that is inherently a luxury. When so many are mourning deaths - I see the numbers - it seems like I shouldn’t be allowed to worry about the trivial. Yet I also know I should heed the advice I teach: others’ struggles do not lessen mine. Everything is relative.

I find myself preparing lesson plan fragments based on thoughts I have while running, news articles my good friend and amateur theologian sends me, podcasts I tune in and out of, and topics my partner and I discuss on almost daily walks. I feel like I have a pot of topics overflowing that can only be tamed by feeding them (wow that metaphor fell apart fast) to a classroom full of middle or high school students, or with a group of college-aged staff. How would you and your peers respond?

• Has having a connection to Judaism helped during this?
• Why? What is your connection? Is it stronger or weaker now?
• Why is mine so weak?
• Have your sources of information changed?
• Are there any new traditions in your home?
• Screen restrictions before bed have made reading news intentionally difficult and sleep slightly easier.
• What’s the best thing you’ve baked/cooked recently?
• Ok so matzah pizza with matzah from scratch is now in the regular (non-Passover) rotation.
• Does an event like this impact your belief in G-d?

I’ve been accused of using my classroom as a form of journaling, something in which I take pride. It’s important to allow myself to be vulnerable, to an extent. I feel it allows those around me to open up as well, to know themselves better. This is how I know myself and my community. By showing care and spending time with those willing to learn - not through frontal lectures but through connections. Because of this, I hope you continue to share with me how you are, how you have adapted, how you struggle, and how you mourn.

Me? My Judaism continues to endure: Nicole and my weekly Shabbat video calls with our St. Paul friends with High, Low, Hero, & Goals; connecting with a close former student over our shared running; weekly family video calls trying not to talk about COVID; philosophical discussions brought on by the latest episode of Stargate or Preach; and of course eating matzah well past Pesach. We’re counting the Omer in Judaism now, sort of a time of mourning. A time without haircuts or celebrations (oddly familiar) is part of being Jewish in the few months between Pesach and Shavuot.

To be honest, I’m not really feeling that though. This year I might take counting of the Omer off. Celebrate what I can: getting my grandma set up on Zoom, having my own garden for the first time ever, making our own ice cream, checking in on those I love, playing board games online with friends, cutting my own hair (happy about that clipper purchase in 2011), and not getting scratched by that cat.

I hope you have things worth celebrating, or maybe this has helped you think of what you hadn’t before. I hope you feel comfortable reaching out and saying hi, asking for board game recommendations, or even for help with math. I hope you remember and apply our discussions, that you care for one another. I hope you are well.

Maybe my connection to Judaism isn’t diminishing, just changing. But when everything is in such a state of tumult, I’m not sure I want that change.


Your teacher, friend,

Avi

Kyoto Prefecture

Woah. Ready?
Deep Breath, this may be quite a reach.

Hiked in Krabi, slept on beach.
Bye to JAlter, hi Bangkok,
High five Mitch, long airport walk.
Red-eye to Tokyo. Bullet train,
Soba noodles - like chow mein!
Sake drinks and 日本語 beer,
with a US rock-loving cashier.
Nearby ramen, snacks on snacks,
sleepy time, we can relax!

[breathe]

Wake up late, can't fit in shower -
Bamboo forest for an hour.
Monkey friends, then meet for tour.
Shrines and temples - our evils will cure.
    [primates and gates]
End of the day puts us in the mood
For high quality Japanese fast food.
Next day we prep our layers,
time we hike and say some prayers.
Snowy mountain, hike to top,
then we eat at local shop.
Outside onsen*, relax a ton,
soothing baths for everyone.

This morning we woke up at a Ryokan - a traditional Japanese hotel, had very traditional breakfast, and after a failed attempt to tour a sake museum, we're on the bullet train back to Tokyo for the last leg of our trip.

Pictures

*An onsen is a Japanese public bath - a mix of a mikvah and a spa.

Time in Krabi

Pictures (I know why you're really here)

Michael, J, and I arrived in Krabi in the early evening, we grabbed a taxi to the hotel (a really nice place called White Sand quite a ways off the beaten path, recommended by Raleigh and Nick). It's a 3 story small building with significantly nicer amenities than our AirBnB in Chiang Mai, but certainly not a resort - the perfect mix for our needs.
We ate Thai food at a nearby (10 min walk) restaurant - what I assume is the Thai version of a greasy spoon. The bathroom was a toilet in an outhouse out back and the place to wash hands for that was a spigot which was also being used for laundry. Michael and I had our first coconuts, turns out fresh coconut water is nothing like the packaged stuff that's sold at a premium. Straight from the nut, it's sweet and refreshing. Most of the fun there was actually scooping out the jelly-like flesh and deciding with every bite if I actually liked it or not.

Friday morning was an early start for me, I woke up around 4:00am local time, ran 2.5 miles along a pre-sunrise beach (sand running is hard), and paced up and down it after the sun came through. It was pretty cloudy; so the perfect sunrise, I did not see. An incredible array of shells, rocks, and crabs litter the beach - also, unfortunately some litter.
First activity of the day involved venturing out to the more touristy Ao Nang beach to see what was around. Of course the best way to do that was with motorbikes! We asked the front desk where to rent them and seemingly with magic, she was bringing 3 motorbikes out for us. She handed us helmets and the keys and that was it! Training was provided by J, who has his own motorbike in Chiang Mai. A 20 minute open-air drive down local roads with no apparent concrete traffic laws brought us to a buzzing market on the road where we had some coffee, explored, ate lunch, then walked along Ao Nang beach below. The overcast sky seemed to be dropping as a haze prevented us from seeing any of the fairly nearby islands (read: towering rock formations) clearly.
On our way back from the beach, we detoured through some farm land to get a closer view of some of the rock formations (dubbed the cliffs of insanity by me).
Once back to our quiet area, we did what one does in paradise: relax on the beach. laying and reading turned to swimming, then in drying off I went playing in the sand of course! I made a friend, Kevin, a 5 year old from China who helped me dig a 4.5ft hole and let me practice my Chinese.
A quick shower and change of clothes and we decided we wanted to try Thai's Italian food. Down the road we motorbiked to get very fancy pizza, risotto, and pasta before calling it a night.

Saturday we were picked up at 7:00am and dropped off at the Krabi Diving Center. We were fitted with wetsuits and masks then got in the back of a truck for a quick ride (basically back to our hotel area) to a beach with hundreds of these wooden boats with outboard motors (the most outboard possible, as the entire engine was resting on a gimbal on the back of the boat. The engine had a 15 ft rod with a propeller at the end which allowed the driver to steer. All of the boats were sponsored by the same purple and gold bank. A 30 minute loud boat ride to some of those "islands" and we were ready to begin lessons. The instructor, Gao, knew I was certified, that Michael had been before, and this was J's first. After verbally explaining basic safety measures and claiming he would be in charge of Michael and J's BCA (Buoyancy Control Apparatus), we back-flipped into the water for some more lessons. Turns out that wasn't needed, and similar to the motorbikes, Gao lead us down right away. We went on 2 separate 40 minute dives, the second one was about 14 meters (45ft) deep at the lowest. Incredible fish, sea anemones, urchins, coral, sponges, and more. We saw four lion fish total, definitely the highlight for me.
After the second dive, Gao gave us a meal he picked up from a street vendor before boarding - rice, egg, spicy onions and peppers, and squid, including an entire squid about 5 inches in length. I tried the rings of the squid but wasn't brave enough to attempt the whole guy. Watermelon was also cut up for us, which we chowed down on the loud drive back to shore.
Diving took a lot out of us so a nap was in order, of course.
We rented motorbikes again to head into town and eat at an Indian place, which was incredible.
The night ended with us drinking some local beer (Chang) on the beach, as one does in paradise.

This morning, we're heading off for a 5 mile hike, maybe updates from that soon.

Thailand’s culture

Pictures for those of you who don't like reading.

We’ve spent 2 full days in Chiang Mai now - reportedly the coldest days Chiang Mai has had in quite some time, so of course we we’ve been wearing shorts and short sleeve shirts. We’ve seen some wats (Buddist temples), bathed with elephants, walked through markets, enjoyed local cuisine and Thai-ized American cuisine, caught up with old friends, and made some new ones. Something I’ve noticed in our short time here is the strictness of rule following and how it varies and differs from similar rules in the states. Seeing some of the local happenings, I’m reminded of this scene from Pirates of the Caribbean: The curse of the Black Pearl where Barbosa clarifies the “[Pirates] code is more what you'd call ‘guidelines’ than actual rules.” And in a pretty stark contrast to this, it seems that many social customs tend to be fairly rigid, or at least formal, in their systems.

Laws? Well, it’s more of a suggestion.
I would not call myself well studied in Thailand’s legal system, nor am I well versed in that of America’s for that matter. However, I do have a propensity for remembering and following rules. I loved studying for and taking the exam for my watercraft license, just the same with the driver’s permit assessment. It seems that country rules and regulations aren’t enforced or even really acknowledged. Jon Alter has a theory related to this. He calls it “Don’t search for logic.”

Even on the busiest of roads, cars rarely exceed 40 mph (~65 kph) and casually walking across them is common. As a pedestrian, it’s really convenient to not have to wait at crosswalks for the light to turn to white-light-walking-figure. If you need to get to the other side of the road, simply wait for a small opening in traffic and commit. Cars, motorbikes, and tuk-tuks will slow to allow you to pass. The few times we’ve been in a motorized vehicle, it hasn’t been noticeable. Soothing sounds of Thai talk radio or hard-core American rap play from car stereos as the car fluxuates between 10 and 30 mph a couple times a block.

Telephone lines across nearly every street, road, and dirt path number in the hundreds. We’ve seen a what I assume are phone-line technicians, but for all we know may be just regular citizens looking to fix their DSL, climbing up to “fix” (presumably) the lines. From what we can tell, if a line breaks, it’s left in place and a new one is strung along its original path. It seem the only things you need to fix the wiring here is a large spool of cable, a ladder, and some bravery.

Scaffolding is handmade on the spot out of bamboo shoots. They cut and tie the giant natural PVC pipe to the right lengths and tie them together to climb up. I think this is really neat. In order to repair or paint something high up, workers build a structure to which they entrust their lives from essentially raw materials. I can’t even imagine American construction workers building scaffolding out of anything other than pre-made kits.

The sidewalk along roads can be as much as 1 foot higher than the road it runs alongside. To accommodate for this height difference, there is usually a smooth steep slope of concrete connecting the two. This is the perfect slide to slip on and fall head-first into traffic (something we have thankfully yet to experience). Sidewalks range from 2 inches wide to 3 feet and often have trees, signs, or street vendors on them. Like Minnesota in the winter, lane-lines are barely a suggestion as cars and motorbikes often zig-zag through traffic, around parked cars and trucks, pedestrians, and ambulances.

Social norms? Slowly learning.
The first term I tried to learn in Thai was “Thank you.” It took a while to feel confident saying, but “Kob Khun” is the term for thank you. In Thai, from what I can glean so far, phrases and greetings end with a status indicator. As a male, speaking politely to a peer or someone of higher status, I would say thank you with “Kob Khun Krab,” though it seems “Kob Khun kab” is a more casual way. Females would say “Kob Khun Kha.” Unlike many other languages, the words you use depend primarily on the person speaking, not the person being spoken to or about. Sorry = Kor Tod Kab, Hello = Sa Wad Dee Kab, How are you = Sa Bai Dee Mai Kab

Slight bows are common signs of farewell and pressing both hands together is a way to show gratitude, respect, or as a greeting.

Tipping isn’t common, though for exceedingly wonderful service, a small tip of 10% may be added. Some of the tourist heavy areas take advantage of Americans being used to tipping. Generally, we’ve been not haggling which is our way of including a tip.

I’ve noticed a few American customs creeping into the touristy parts - tuk-tuk (2 wheeled open air taxis) drivers give an American head nod to white people on the street as a way to inquire if they’d like a ride, I’m seen some Thai girls pose with the duck-face for pictures, and I’m sure there are more that I haven’t even realized are the melding of cultures. I hope in picking up Western customs, Thai’s own are not lost, but in the metropolitan areas, it does seem to have very western aspects.

People are incredibly friendly here, both locals and tourists we’ve run into. It seems everyone is enjoying the calm atmosphere and is happy to help out their fellow human.

Here are some relevant pictures to what I wrote about and other things I didn’t that we’ve done over the past few days.

Day 1: Bangkok

Quick update:

For our first day in Bangkok, Michael and I explored the 5 Star hotel we stayed at for one night. Awesome pool with view of the river - great sunny day (sorry Minnesota)

From the hotel we walked with our full bags through some local streets on the way to Chua Phat Vang, a tall golden temple we had seen from the pool area.

We took a crowded river boat West along the river towards Wat Arun.

We wandered into a really nice community park (Saranrom Park) which had an outdoor public gym in it. There was also a Chinese ancestral house inside the park.

We soon found ourselves at a local event called Thai rice - basically a huge farmers market / art fair that was based on rice. Some local Thai people around our age mocked us walking through their market in our full backpacking gear. The odd feeling of embarrassment was subdued when a nice Thai lady helped us order some food and we ate pot stickers and pad Thai.

We found a local hostel / bar and took a load off for a couple hours before heading to the airport to travel to our home for 3 nights in Chiang Mai.

Travel Overload

Got to the airport Saturday morning at 5:20. I passed a sniffer dog checking on everyone in the security line, and right after I passed him, he got a playbreak! Squeaky-ball fetch time meant a delay and some entertainment for patient travelers behind me in line.

The 3 hour flight to Dallas Texas would have been significantly less awful if I hadn't been sitting directly behind a screaming child, upwards of 130 decibels. This lasted the first 2 hours straight. So much for reading or napping - I took advantage of the in-flight entertainment and watched (but barely heard) The Dark Tower. (It's bad).

One and a half hours in Texas and two and a half shots of Whiskey later and we were on our way to South Korea. I made the decision to change my watch to Thailand time and try to keep to that schedule moving forward in an effort to prevent jet-lag. 

15 hours seems like a long time on a plane, so let's just put things into perspective. I watched 4 movies (Logan Lucky, Birth of the Dragon, The Big Sick, and most of Transformers: Last Knight) and if I hadn't spent the other 8 hours eating, pacing down the aisle, trying to read, or staring blankly at the digital map; I could have easily seen 5 more. I was very lucky to have an exit row, aisle seat for this long flight, making up for the screaming child on the previous one. (I think I'd prefer an airline that allowed passengers to assist in flight-attendant duties for a portion of the flight.)
After taking off my shoes and replacing them with the complimentary plane slippers, I was able to stretch my feet out as far as I could - a rarity for someone my height. We had 2 meals on that flight, I got bibimbap which was surprisingly good for plane food, and Chinese style rice with fish, which was fine.

In the Korean airport, Michael and I took some of the few minutes we had before transferring planes to explore some of the stores in the international section of the airport - turned out to be pretty lame, common international stores including an Auntie Annie's. Noticing from my watch that it was mid-afternoon in Thailand, I proudly proclaimed to Michael how, since we'd arrive late at night, I would not sleep on this last plane ride.

Cut Scene -Avi's passed out on the plane before it's left the gate. After a casual 20 minute nap, I awake to find that we're still at the gate. Drowsily listening to the delay announcements, I pass out for another 20+ minutes to find we still haven't left.

Something was wrong with the engine, but after 2 hours just sitting in our seats; we eventually take off. A relatively short flight (6 hours) later. We arrived in Bangkok, Thailand. Figuring out customs, getting passports stamped, getting a cab, exchanging currency, and making sure Michael's phone service worked were some of the highlights from our first few hours. 

It's 4:00AM now, so I haven't succeeded in preventing Jet-lag. Sleeping soon, getting psyched for a fun day exploring Bangkok tomorrow!